Sunday, January 20, 2013

What I Learned...................

Ok, so I made this realization several years ago that has opened my mind to be a bit more understanding and compassionate toward others. Never realized I had been doing it, but was feeling let down frequently, and I didn't like it.

I  would  anticipate how I expected people to respond or act based on my logic. Crazy right???

What ended up happening was I would become disappointed too easily, not realizing I was setting myself up for the fall.

This evening, my 15 year old son came in and took care of the pellet stove without being asked. As he walked by, I thanked him. He smiled and said "you're the only one who thanked me." I explained my theory of not expecting certain responses and scenarios from people and you won't be let down as much. Thought I would save him years of figuring that one out.

His reply...."oh so I should lower my standards?" It got me thinking. He's got a really valid point!...... there has to be a middle of the road.

Where is the line between wishful thinking that others think like us and everyone marches to their own drummer? There needs to be freedom of thought yet mindfulness towards not judging others based on our own personal checklist. Just because I would stand up and greet someone when they come into my home, doesn't mean other family members would do the same, when I go into their home.

Recently someone shared with me something someone else had said about others. To me it felt like gossip and not something I wanted to hear or be a part of..... It was not positive in nature, nor did it make for good feelings. She viewed it differently and said it was not gossip, it was fact. Neither of us were right nor wrong. We saw the situation differently and need to respect each other's point of view.

Our own open mindedness, along with consideration of others feelings really needs to be part of our daily attention. It is in the willingness to understand others that we have a clearer understanding of ourselves....I mean.......that's how I see it anyway.

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