What Color Is Your Car???.........

"You will simply not be the same person two months from now after consciously giving thanks, for the abundance that exists in your life, you will have set in motion an ancient spiritual law: the more you have and are grateful for, the more you will be given."  ~ Sarah Ban Breathnach

This quote serves as a reminder of the power we hold within our thoughts and gratitude. My recommendation......give it a try!!...print out the quote and commit to the challenge. I believe we will start to notice so much (and I'm talking more than materialistic "things") that is abundantly present in our Lives.

Similar to.....you've got a blue car, you start to notice other blue cars.....notice and give thanks for kindness, compassion and generosity my dear readers and you will notice it all around you!

**NOTE FROM ME: Needing some extra help today....I decided it's best to share a previous posting, rather than composing something new while still feeling so lousy with this cold. "Know thyself dear readers and when you can make adjustments that ease your stresses."
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So here is my new theory..........which incidentally I passed by a stressed cashier last week and he totally thought it made sense, so I could be on to something.

The more we are able to "receive" what comes our way, rather than "resist", the less stress we will feel...and I think we can all agree that being less stressed is a better way to live!

I try to remain aware, so that when I start to feel I am on the defense, I quickly turn it around. When feeling defensive regardless of what anyone says to me you can be pretty sure my response will be sourly negative and maybe even nasty. Now I know what the people who know me are thinking: "Maria nasty? You've got to be kidding" and then there are a tiny few...ok hopefully only a couple of you who really know me are thinking "yeah Maria can get nasty all right."

Negativity can certainly build and create a thick defensive layer, which over time pushes people away. If it's natural to resist what comes our way, nothing can ever land on a soft welcoming place.

                Here is what I try to do when I find myself defensive and resisting the moment:

Shrug my shoulders a few times to release the stress in my neck

Silently ask myself "is this really something to get worked up about?" 

Take a few deep cleansing breaths

Ask myself  "will this matter tomorrow?"

Consider what the other person is going through, that has resulted in them saying or doing something to me that is hurtful or discouraging

 .........if none of the above seems to help, I revert to something my amazing nephew taught me.

        "When in an uncomfortable situation, to break the tension, simply say...

I love Unicorns!"

Digging Deeper...........

No joke.....some days are tougher than others. That's where I'm at right now...the tougher side. I have said in the past "my blog will be a genuine reflection of my thoughts and feeling." So that's what you get today my dear readers. A  sick with a nasty cold, discouraged, frustrated blog writer.

The thing is this...I can rationally think, I have so many positive Blessings in my Life. Shelter, warmth, amazingly supportive family and friends and the list  goes on and on.....but today I FEEL sad and discouraged just the same.

Clearly I need to partake in some serious get down to the bottom of it.......whoop ass!

At times like this, we need to remind ourselves that thoughts and feelings really are two separate things. There are thoughts we create, thoughts that come on their own that we interpret and then feelings we are left with...... because of the thoughts....to then interpret ...oh dear all so very exhausting.

So I draw strength from the mantras, positive thoughts and tips I frequently share. As well as ask myself what am I suppose to be learning during this frustrating time??? ...knowing honestly that the glass 1/2 empty feeling WILL shift back to a glass 1/2 full and my feelings and I will be just fine...good Lord willin' and the creek don't rise! 

What I Learned...................

Ok, so I made this realization several years ago that has opened my mind to be a bit more understanding and compassionate toward others. Never realized I had been doing it, but was feeling let down frequently, and I didn't like it.

I  would  anticipate how I expected people to respond or act based on my logic. Crazy right???

What ended up happening was I would become disappointed too easily, not realizing I was setting myself up for the fall.

This evening, my 15 year old son came in and took care of the pellet stove without being asked. As he walked by, I thanked him. He smiled and said "you're the only one who thanked me." I explained my theory of not expecting certain responses and scenarios from people and you won't be let down as much. Thought I would save him years of figuring that one out.

His reply...."oh so I should lower my standards?" It got me thinking. He's got a really valid point!...... there has to be a middle of the road.

Where is the line between wishful thinking that others think like us and everyone marches to their own drummer? There needs to be freedom of thought yet mindfulness towards not judging others based on our own personal checklist. Just because I would stand up and greet someone when they come into my home, doesn't mean other family members would do the same, when I go into their home.

Recently someone shared with me something someone else had said about others. To me it felt like gossip and not something I wanted to hear or be a part of..... It was not positive in nature, nor did it make for good feelings. She viewed it differently and said it was not gossip, it was fact. Neither of us were right nor wrong. We saw the situation differently and need to respect each other's point of view.

Our own open mindedness, along with consideration of others feelings really needs to be part of our daily attention. It is in the willingness to understand others that we have a clearer understanding of ourselves....I mean.......that's how I see it anyway.

The Rules......

While in a medical waiting room this morning, I was pleasantly surprised to see this sign next to the check in window. Love it!

            

                                                   

Viewer Discretion Advised.......

Before I sit to type a post, I toss around ideas and do a "mood check in" to see what I want to share and what is feeling relevant to me at that moment. I did that this morning and couldn't decide on an exact starting point, then it hit me....missing out on the obvious around us. That's what I will share today.

Sometimes we don't even see the obvious that is right is front of us.

Case in point: A few months back, I was sitting in my living room visiting with a friend.....I look up over the doorway and you see those motivational words in the above photos? IMAGINE and INSPIRE. Well they weren't saying quite that. I look up to see the words below. Yes, my words of comfort and motivation had been hacked! I quickly text my oldest son and asked..."how long has there been a "man penis" in the living room?" His text back, "next week will be a MONTH!"       

                                                 

Are you kidding me????? My mind could not race fast enough as to who had been in our home and potentially seen this! He and his brother explained, it had been the last day of summer vacation and they wanted to do something fun! So they had at it with our living room decor. I must say I thought it was  hilarious!! I could not believe I had not seen it before that night. The crazy thing was I had been cleaning earlier in the day for a get together. I was dusting the casing below the letters, cautious not to let the letters fall. At which point I said to my son "it's amazing what you see when you know people are coming over." I was referring to dust. And his reply of  "sometimes something is right in front of you and you don't see it!" made a whole lot more sense after the discovery.

It really made me stop and think how we can go along our days and not really SEE!  We take for granted what we think we know to be true. I'm a bit more aware these days....and let me tell you....I look at those letters everyday (now back in their respective locations)  and smirk.

I know for me I can get caught up in "the race" and lose sight of the obvious in my Life. Like my awesome husband who drives an hour and twenty minutes back and forth to work everyday, (that would so fall into the "just say no" category for me) or how he asks me if I want the last bite of dessert when we are splitting something yummy. Or asking if he can get me anything once we've settled in for the night. His dedication to seeing that my needs are met is  exceptional. It means the world to me and I'm pretty sure I don't thank him nearly enough. They become the obvious and then I just expect it. Not any more! I take the oath~
"I will express more frequently my appreciation for the routine and obvious. I will not lose sight of my surroundings, the people in it or any time of man penis appears in my home!"

So what are you missing in your day to day routine??? Stop and take a look, you never know what you might SEE!

Just Listen...............

"Sometimes the most important thing in the whole day is the rest we take between two deep breaths, or the turning inwards in prayer for five short minutes." ~ Etty Hillsum


There is a calming sense that washes over me when I take a moment to focus in between two breaths. Sometimes I even close my eyes  and whisper a silent Thank You. It reminds and grounds me to the many Blessings in my day. If I don't stop and acknowledge them....they are lost! The value and nourishment that was so sweetly intended slips away and becomes harder to see the next time.

There is strength, wisdom and momentum that can build from such a brief silence... all we need to do is listen.

Take a Ride.................

Well, the weather is getting colder here in New England, which translates into me becoming a hermit of sorts. I prefer to stay warm indoors and not feel the chill on my face for any length of time. Although my sons would be the first to announce that its pretty darn chilly in our 320 year old farmhouse. And well, they are right, but the chill in here is a whole lot warmer than the chill out there.

A perk to being an indoor creature is the many things I can work on. As the temperature dips outside (and yes boys inside too) I take part in projects for both the house and my own personal growth.

This past week I have busied myself with cleaning and organizing to get rid of and simplify. On the personal front, I have been working on increasing viewership of my blog and preparing for a talk I will be giving in mid March. Definitely the later two are more enjoyable to me in both a scary and exciting kind of way.

When I spoke in my New Year Rush post on January 2nd, I shared my need to tackle something out of my comfort zone. Well, I've picked something...... I am putting together a "Connect With Your Life" presentation. It certainly falls into the category of "firsts" and its something that has been on my mind for several months. I will talk about how positive thoughts and energy, as well as recharging my Life to stay connected has brought calm and peace into my days as well as feel good moments. OK certainly not everyday, all day...but calm, peace and positive energy more than I had, so I'll take it. The benefits for myself and others are plentiful and that's what I want to share.

As I wrote and rewrote all that I want to share in the class, I quickly ran into problems that felt overwhelming and halted my writing/thought process. My first reaction was to walk away. Stop working on it and figuring the feeling of being overwhelmed would be gone. Then it hit me...it's not a problem at all, it is a challenge and an opportunity. I stuck with it and pushed through. I did a re eval and realized in the case of struggling to capture my thoughts in the order I want to present them, I could instead write them out separately and then number them in the order I want to share them..and keep in mind the "hiccup" part for me is knowing I won't be reading them, I want to speak from my heart and own personal experiences. 

The opportunity of taking on something that I consider "out there" for me, is an amazing chance to put into play the techniques I have been using over the past year and a half. One of calming, facing fears and listening to my inner voice, all helps guide me. I remind myself that the racy anxious feeling means I am onto something that matters!! My journey is one of both the known and unknown. Along the way I am learning so much about myself and others. I can't imagine not having this experience!

Think about your own challenges that present themselves. There are opportunities there!!! Let's grab hold and see where we can soar. There will be ups and downs through it all, but we can hold on real tight and enjoy the ride together. 

Feel free to message me through a comment. I don't have to publish it if you would rather correspond separately...just let me know. We can be here to support each other...after all..... It's what the ride is all about!

                                         
                                            illustration courtesy of dreamy giraffe

New Year Rush.....................

                             

I've got it.....that "it's all new", "let's mix things up", "anything is possible" new year feel. So as these feelings of invincibility race through me, my practical side reels it in a bit and tries to tame the fire inside.

But what if I didn't, what if I ran with it for as long as the feelings remain, see what happens, toss to the wind the cautious and protective Me. The one that generally has to plan and be precise to keep anxiety in check???

Quite honestly in the past year and a half I have exhaled a great deal. I have seen the advantages (and some disadvantages) of easing the strains I frequently impose on myself. Today I feel ready to ease things a bit more. It is actually the unknown that is intriguing me...now that's a change.

That decides it.....I'm forging ahead with this New Year feel, this power and inner strength, while asking myself  "is it building momentum in my quests?" and all I can come up with is....Hell ya'....so here goes...kicking off 2013 and jumping in! ....Join me??